31 January 2012

I've Changed..

you know what? yes. i have changed. I'm not as nice as i used to be, because i don't want to get used or walked over. i don't trust everyone and tell them my secrets, because behind every fake smile is a backstabbing bitch. i distance myself from people because in the end, they are going to leave. i have changed because i have realized that I'm the only person that i can depend on at the end of the day.

19 January 2012

Where do i begin?

where do i begin?
to tell the story of my latest misery,
a sorrowful pain with broken integrity,
a dream that is forever lost in eternity,
where do i start?

how long will i last?
has my fragile body lost the will to thrive?
a long lost story in these pages we call life,
a mournful cry escaped my heart tonight,
it fills my world.

can you tell me why?
why do i bear this unspeakable throb of mine?
my weak body no longer wants to fight,
it longs to surrender to the echoes of the night..
What can i say?

Love Story

my favorite song from my favorite movie Love Story and my favorite set of pictures combined! obviously i have nothing to do and i cant sleep.. so i made this video.. and i miss him so much. :(

Where do I begin to tell the story
Of how great a love can be
The sweet love story that is older than the sea
The simple truth about the love she brings to me
Where do I start

With her first hello
She gave a meaning to this empty world of mine
There'd never be another love another time
She came into my life and made the living fine
She fills my heart

She fills my heart
with very special things
With angel songs, with wild imaginings
She fills my soul with so much love
That any where I go
I'm never lonely
With her along who could be lonely
I reach for her hand. It’s always there

How long does it last
Can love be measured by the hours in a day
I have no answers now but this much I can say
I know I'll need her until the stars all burn away
And she'll be there..

18 January 2012


When tears never fall, and birds never fly.
Winter never ends, and children never cry.
When the nights are not dark, and the days are not light.
When forever does finally end, and the eyes have no sight.
When ears cannot hear, and the grass never grows.
When silence is too loud, and the genius never knows.
When strength doesn't strengthen, and flowers never bloom.
When hearts can't be broken, and eternity is too soon.
When the wind never blows, and the rain is never wet.
When thunder can't be heard, and the sun refuses to set.
When angels don't protect, and a fact is not true.
When life can't be lived, and the sky is not blue.
When the truth is a lie, and the fake becomes so real.
The clock shows no time, and wounds never heal.
When enjoyment isn't fun, and bells cannot ring.
When a race cannot be won, and a singer cannot sing.
When pain does not hurt, and enemies never fight.
When rainbows have no color, and something wrong seems so right.
When all these things finally happen, when they finally come true.
That's when I, without a doubt, will stop loving you.

16 January 2012


im a so thankful and blessed to have you both in my life..

15 January 2012


maybe I'm a little sad. sometimes its too hard to smile. sometimes theres nothing to smile about. what do you do when everyone is moving and you just can't. I'm stuck. i don't know what to do. i never know what to do. sometimes its just easier to hide under my covers and ignore everyone. you know, sometimes i even ignore myself. did you know that was possible? ignoring myself. maybe I'm a little more than just sad. 

14 January 2012


I've been beyond depressed lately.
i don't have any friend i can talk to,
and I'm scared that they'll open their mouth to someone else.
i can't talk to my boyfriend because i don't want to be a burden
and dump all my problems on him.
I'm officially alone :(

13 January 2012


I've made mistakes in my life. 
I've let people take advantage of me. 
and i accepted way less than i deserve. 
but I've learned from my bad choices 
and even though there are some things i can never get back 
and people who will never be sorry. 
ill know better next time 
and i won't settle for anything less than i deserve. 

09 January 2012


2012 has been pretty good so far. im so happy!!! (tak ada kena mengena dengan keputusan kes DSAI pagi ni) im happy because my MBA application has been approved! so excited nak start study blk. its more than 3 years after i completed my degree. hehe. mula-mula tu tak ada semangat pun nak apply. dah la submit lambat lepas tu form tak complete sebab website ukm yang lembab tu! *do something please* masa pergi interview last thursday pun tak well prepared. nasib baik diorang tanya soalan yang senang.. why MBA, why must we choose you, tell us about yourself, blablabla.. tu pun nervous sgt! Alhamdulillah dapat. the most happiest person, apart from my mum is ayman. dia happy sebab dia boleh buat kerja kat office dengan tenang tak ada gangguan dari anasir2 luar. u ingat u boleh lepas ke kalau i sibuk dengan study pun. muahahaha. and he thinks selama ni my job merayau2 kat mall je everday and i need to do something useful. eh shopping pun satu pekerjaan apa. menjana ekonomi negara. kan.. kan..

my class will start early next month. i hope i can cope with work and class at the same time. wish me all the best people! in love and light. XX.

happy new year?

happy new year!! ke dah lambat sgt?

hello.. miss me? :p how are you? hows life? hows new year? whats your new year resolution? lamanya tak update blog, (bak kata izzati lama gila.. suka sgt dia guna perkataan gila skrg..) dari last year tak ada new post. hehehe.. im busy travelling around malaysia.. me and my family went to kelantan, perak, kedah and pahang. south je belum. soon insyaallah. best jugak Malaysia ni. macam-macam ada.. cewah *ayat org tak ada budget nak pergi oversea.. hakhak*

I get a new haircut! yeay :D on new years eve kim kardashian tweet that dia nak try bangs for new year. and seperti biasa la orang disini mesti tergedik2 nak tiru kim kardashian.

cantik tak kim with her bangs :)
i mmg dah lama mengidam nak buat fringe. tapi disebabkan i have a small forehead semua hair stylist tak advice bt fringe. tapi bila dah tengok kim kardashian mana blh jadi kan. mesti nak ikut jugak. hehe.. lagi pun all the celebs semua mcm pernah buat fringe je *sedapkan hati sendiri* :p

selena gomez, kiera knightley, camilla belle
cheryl cole, sandra bullock, jessica alba
cute kan semua with fringe :D

so i got a fringe!! mula2 tu rasa pelik je. my mother gelak non stop dia cakap tak sesuai. izzati tengok tak berkedip mata :( my brother and my boyfriend je cakap ok. you guys are my heroes! but actually i pun rasa pelik jugak. haha! maybe it doesnt suit my face. but no harm trying kan.

say hello to my new jerawat, eh hair :D

so what do you think? yay or nay?